“I actually attack the concept of happiness. The idea that - I don’t mind people being happy - but the idea that everything we do is part of the pursuit of happiness seems to me a really dangerous idea and has led to a contemporary disease in Western society, which is fear of sadness. It’s a really odd thing that we’re now seeing people saying “write down 3 things that made you happy today before you go to sleep”, and “cheer up” and “happiness is our birthright” and so on. We’re kind of teaching our kids that happiness is the default position - it’s rubbish. Wholeness is what we ought to be striving for and part of that is sadness, disappointment, frustration, failure; all of those things which make us who we are. Happiness and victory and fulfillment are nice little things that also happen to us, but they don’t teach us much. Everyone says we grow through pain and then as soon as they experience pain they say “Quick! Move on! Cheer up!” I’d like just for a year to have a moratorium on the word “happiness” and to replace it with the word “wholeness”. Ask yourself “is this contributing to my wholeness?” and if you’re having a bad day, it is.” - Hugh Mackay
Today a brother of a good friend of mine (who is also a good friend of mine himself) lamented on Facebook that there is some sort of taboo that we have on sadness, that we sometimes go all out to avoid sadness of others although it is just a different side of the same coin. I can see where this comes from, especially from motivational speakers who talk about the power of positive psychology on success and all the shebang or simply from the human nature of avoiding discomfort. However, embracing sadness is not about being in the state all the time, or about downplaying the sadness itself. It is about acceptance and about cherishing the mortality of life that gives more meaning, create deeper relationships, and allow ourselves to experience humanity.
When was the last time you felt human?
For me, it was that feeling I had when I pooped. Bliss.
Animated GIFs are ful of win.
Let's have a wholesome week ahead!
Nothing productive comes out from being sad and being in that depressed and unhappy mode. When you realised you wasted so much time on it, lagi sad
ReplyDeleteAllowing yourself to experience the sadness is cathartic. It also makes you appreciate the happy times better. I can go on and on, but you have Google.
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